I feel... lonely.

Emotional breakdown time? Maybe. I don't know. At the moment, where I am, how I feel, what I want to do, I just want to vomit it out on this blog. Seriously. And in advance, I apologize in advance, because you might find this post pointless and stupid, and full of grammatical mistakes. But I need a source to let out on.

Ever since I moved here, its not the same. And unfortunately, it never will be. I am not happy. No. I don't think I will be. Its like, Ive been caged. I have no social life. No real friends. YES, ofcourse I have friends. But they aren't real. No. I want my old friends back. Now. But. I cant have them. FML. I mean it.
The summer has started, and all I've been doing is playing football with people who'd only play football with me. And thats about it. I went out with a couple of acquaintances ONCE. Just once. And... I feel so depressed about the fact that, I have no one to look up to, no one to talk to at night when Im bored. And dont think the people I know are bad, no no. Misconceptions arent good. They're nice people, but I cant relate to them. The stuff they talk about, etc etc etc. I dont get them. Theres a few, who I would possibly become good friends with. But then nothing more. No real friends. No true friends.
I miss the place where I belong. I don't like being here.
And you might think I'm overreacting. Trust me, I feel like I am too. But I cant control myself. I feel so messed up tonight. And, I feel its because of my school. Since I came here in the middle of a year and had to wait for a new session, I had to join a small school. Unfortunately, the people there weren't for me. I don't know what to do.
I feel this way because back where I lived, there wasn't a moment when I felt bored, or alone, and then I had no one to talk to. Here, its just like that. I feel bored, or alone, and I try to talk to someone, not just one person, but I get no feedback. Honestly, I'd really love to say I've had enough, but that'll do me no good. Because I have to live the rest of my life here...

I have to...

Douchebag

We all have that one person who co-exists among us; that person who loves bragging, boasting, and well, bullshitting. That very person, my friends, is known as a Douchebag. Its usually a he, so I'm going to refer to the general 'Douchebag' term, as a he in this post.

Douchebags sometimes exist peacefully among us, but sometimes they dont. They often get REALLY annoying, but then they are sometimes humorous. If you still dont know who I'm talking about, its that person who would ALWAYS be there, trying to butt in, act cool, show off, and ALWAYS try and make themselves look more important... Yes, whoever you're thinking of now must be the Douchebag who exists in your life; there may be more than one, though. These attention seekers should not be trusted, neither should they be given any further attention too, because all that motivates them is the attention they are getting.

Their attention seeking, false experiences may be interesting, but after a point, it gets SO irritating, you feel like punching them in the face. These Douchebags brag about how they've had a million girlfriends, how they've been with the hottest girls, how they are so 'FILTHY' rich and own their own car, they boast about how they're so tough and have beaten up 10 guys at once with one hand tied behind their back. (I MAY be exaggerating a little bit, but its because of my annoyance.)

Example 1: (At school)

Dude 1: Hey! Duude listen, I was at the cinema, watching Inception yesterday, and I saw Rose, that hot girl from our class. She said HI to me, and we had a long conversation! :D I didnt even think she knew I existed!
Dude 2: WOW, really? Shit man thats awesome :O
Dude 1: I know ri-
Douchebag *Interrupting*: Psh, you mean that girl with the brown hair?! Man, I dated her for 7 months. You guys REALLY need a move on.
Dudes 1 and 2: -___-... Yeah man... Totally.

Example 2: (In college)

Dude 1: Man, my dad just bought me a new car! Im so happy! My first car ever!
Dude 2: Damn! You're lucky man. Im still trying to get my licence. Which car did you get?
Dude 1: A brand new Honda Civic man! Isnt that awesome?
Dude 2: Whoa! Thats so good for a firs-
Douchebag *Interrupting*: A CIVIC? Dude I drove that car when I had my licence a year back. Im driving a BMW 7 series. Check it out sometime eh ;)
Dudes 1 and 2: ...

And, whenever they interrupt like that, you feel like doing this to them:

I hope you get the metaphor.

I hope you guys get the picture now. And the unfortunate fact is that, these Douchebags are impossible to avoid, or to change. Being how they are is in their nature. Why they exist though, no one will ever know.

Oh and, watch this video, you'll understand what I'm talking about. Haha

Thats Not Why I Love You.

Okay, first off, i haven't blogged in weeks. Thats because of stupid exams. But currently, im up at 3 am, with something on my mind which i cant keep locked in. I MUST let it out.
I MUST. Hahaha

So, before you read the rest, YOU MUST listen to this song first. You MUST. Im being way too persistent, right?






Okay, now, AFTER listening to this song and possibly paying attention to the lyrics, you will probably understand the point of this blog. Its ok if you still dont though.

Alright, now, Im going to be frank, being 17 years and 5 months old, my hormones are being very very annoying. They're getting out of control as we speak. Or as I write.

I dont know if I love her, but the whole cliche of loving someone because of their looks, appearance, smile, height, weight is stupid. At least thats what I think. Let me know if you think differently. But anyway, after listening to the song, and the lyrics, I can relate to it, and most probably loads of people can too. When you love or like someone, its not because of one particular trait. They may be beautiful, nice, have a great smile, have great gestures, may be cute, etc, but a person who truly likes someone else wouldn't LOVE another for the mentioned reasons. Love is something that builds up over time, a LONG period of time. All that you've been through, all that happened between the two, and how they experienced things together would lead to it. Being yourself around everyone is also a reason.

Personally, whoever Ive liked, it wasn't for their looks. It was because of the fact that they'd like the real me, they'd like me because of who I am. They find my funny, they find me attractive. Which makes me feel exactly like this:



So yes, and not just that, it happens over the development of time. And yes, I know its hard to not appreciate someone and become obsessed because they're stunning, but beware, you are NOT in love. Crushes and love is VERY different.

Being kids, most people wouldn't understand. When I was 13, 14-ishh, I was pretty shallow too. I guess everyone does grow up at a certain point. The reason im blogging about this is that sadly, theres still people as old as me, and possibly older, who break hearts, play around with their partner, which is just depressing and upsetting. I personally have experience, and know people who've been through it.

SO PEOPLE. Hear me out. Whenever someone tells you they love you, dont believe them straight out. See how long you've known them. Dont be bamboozled by their appearance or flattered by their way of persuasion of how being with them would be so perfect. Think for a second, before you do anything. Dont be a mere fool, if he says he loves you in 3 days and you believe him, you, just like him, are not cool. Yes, I couldn't resist. Sorry. Hahaha, its 3 30 am. What can one expect. Well, hope you get the point of this.

Okay, take care people... Dream within a dream, HERE I COME.

Being Carbon Neutral FORTHEWIN.

I was just reading some blogs from some bloggers that I follow, and I found this awesome idea of making your blog-site carbon neutral (here). What happens is they plant a tree for your blog/website, and it has a certain button which neutralizes the carbon content released from the website for quite a while. Pretty awesome eh?

You can do it too ! Just click this picture of the leaf!

 Click it! :)


Trees are really needed, because all the unnecessary deforestation that happens is ruining our planet, planting trees will make it healthier and much cleaner for everyone.

Thank you! :)

Accident

“Wake up!”
The sound of my mother’s voice pierced through my ears like a blow-horn. The fact that she hated my habit of waking up late on weekend holidays irritated me. Those were the only days on which I wouldn’t have to wake up at seven a.m. in the morning!

I tottered along the kitchen, glanced at the large clock, and sighed. Breakfast time was long gone and it was one-thirty p.m. After the usual scolding for waking up late and not being a responsible ‘young-man’, my mother told me to buy her groceries for dinner. Even though I felt lazy and didn’t want to go at all, since I just woke up, I presumed that it would be much better to just leave without any grumpiness, or at least try to, rather than get scolded by her again.

It was scorching hot outside, which made my long walk even worse. I detested the fact that she wouldn’t let me drive to the grocery store; it would be much quicker, and better for me. But her overprotective personality will probably never change.

It seemed like busy afternoon when I got to the main road. I could see the shop right past it. This was the worst part, the drivers were so inconsiderate, if you’d walk by without paying attention, and they wouldn’t care if they would hit you. Having my mind flooded with thoughts of my overprotective mother, the scorching heat and the irritating honking noises, I didn’t see it coming.

All of it happened in a fraction of a second, but it seemed like forever. I was in the middle of the road, and I could hear a relatively louder horn… as if it was right next to me. I finally saw what was coming at me from the corner of my eye; a large truck. My heart jumped up to my throat and at that very moment, I felt a surge of adrenaline, rush through my body, my veins, like a heavy electric current, and I reacted. It was all because if plain instinct; I sprang as hard and fast as my body could allow, and missed the bus by an inch. Then what I heard was a loud screeching noise, and a crash.

I turned around to see that the bus had hit a man on his motor-bike.  He seemed to be in formal clothes; a pant, a shit and a tie. He would have most probably been heading to work, where he would earn for his family. Now, perhaps they would have to wait much longer for him to come home…

Surprisingly, I was perfectly alright, but the man wasn’t. As I drew nearer to him, I could see blood all over his face, his clothes and his hands. His motor-bike was completely wrecked and everyone around the area had surrounded him. The driver of the truck was apparently missing. It was a horrifying scene; the man lay on the floor like he had no bones.  The concerned people called for help, most called the ambulance, some called the police.

Sooner or later, help arrived; time didn’t matter now. I was alive and he was dead. I realized that my mother was right after all, going in the car might have been worse. I would probably be unable to avoid the truck. Thanking God, I walked towards the grocery store, with a sigh of both relief and depression, proceeding with life, as always.