Friday, 27 May 2011

Douchebag

We all have that one person who co-exists among us; that person who loves bragging, boasting, and well, bullshitting. That very person, my friends, is known as a Douchebag. Its usually a he, so I'm going to refer to the general 'Douchebag' term, as a he in this post.
Douchebags sometimes exist peacefully among us, but sometimes they dont. They often get REALLY annoying, but then they are sometimes humorous. If you still dont know who I'm talking about, its that person who would ALWAYS be there, trying to butt in, act cool, show off, and ALWAYS try and make themselves look more important... Yes, whoever you're thinking of now must be the Douchebag who exists in your life; there may be more than one, though. These attention seekers should not be trusted, neither should they be given any further attention too, because all that motivates them is the attention they are getting.

Their attention seeking, false experiences may be interesting, but after a point, it gets SO irritating, you feel like punching them in the face. These Douchebags brag about how they've had a million girlfriends, how they've been with the hottest girls, how they are so 'FILTHY' rich and own their own car, they boast about how they're so tough and have beaten up 10 guys at once with one hand tied behind their back. (I MAY be exaggerating a little bit, but its because of my annoyance.)

Example 1: (At school)

Dude 1: Hey! Duude listen, I was at the cinema, watching Inception yesterday, and I saw Rose, that hot girl from our class. She said HI to me, and we had a long conversation! :D I didnt even think she knew I existed!
Dude 2: WOW, really? Shit man thats awesome :O
Dude 1: I know ri-
Douchebag *Interrupting*: Psh, you mean that girl with the brown hair?! Man, I dated her for 7 months. You guys REALLY need a move on.
Dudes 1 and 2: -___-... Yeah man... Totally.

Example 2: (In college)

Dude 1: Man, my dad just bought me a new car! Im so happy! My first car ever!
Dude 2: Damn! You're lucky man. Im still trying to get my licence. Which car did you get?
Dude 1: A brand new Honda Civic man! Isnt that awesome?
Dude 2: Whoa! Thats so good for a firs-
Douchebag *Interrupting*: A CIVIC? Dude I drove that car when I had my licence a year back. Im driving a BMW 7 series. Check it out sometime eh ;)
Dudes 1 and 2: ...

And, whenever they interrupt like that, you feel like doing this to them:

I hope you get the metaphor.


I hope you guys get the picture now. And the unfortunate fact is that, these Douchebags are impossible to avoid, or to change. Being how they are is in their nature. Why they exist though, no one will ever know.

Oh and, watch this video, you'll understand what I'm talking about. Haha






14 comments:

Kaibee said...

Hahahhaha!! I totally get what you mean! :P hahahah! :P I mean seriously, douchebags need a life. Somehow, they find a way of turning everything, every friggin' thing, about themselves. Somehow, I call it the douche-art! :P

Love your blog. As for chocolate milk, I think I know why you love it so much. I basically have it more than water! :P

Hamza Bin Ladin said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
So true.So true.
There are douche-bags in girls 2.But I don't think that they are THAT bad.Of course they DO itch.They are impossible to be changed but they can BE AVOIDED.They get exposed very soon so there are like kinda fun. Because if you feel like pulling someone's leg,there are always there for you.:P
Like,
U:'Hey XYZ,You have a Hummer at home na ?'
XYZ:-"Oh that yea,we have that since a year now.I'm sick of it now".

U:-"What model do you have?'
XYZ:-'Model? It's latest.I think it's XLi".

U:-LMAO.

I LOVED the song.
MR Douchebag you are a Dumbass:D

Maryam said...

Hahahahahahahahahaha.

You are so right. They can get very annoying at times. SERIOUSLY! Amazing post, man.

I loved that video. xD

Furree Katt said...

everyone is laughing, so i will too.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA LOL U SO FUNNI.

i loved the examples! and that picture is classic.

chocolatemilk said...

Kaibee: Hahah yeah! Ikr? Haha Douche-art is good :P aww thankss!

HBL: Yeah I guess they can be avoided, but its HARD :P They usually appear out of nowhere, and start bragging haha. HAHAHA yeah sometimes douchebags are dumbasses.

Maryam: Haha thanks so much!

Furree: HAHAHA. But, did you really find it amusing, or are you being sarcastic? :P
Haha yeah! I looked so hard for something funny :P Found the perfect picture.

Smokey_Cat said...

haha, I liked your post.
I know a douchebag or two. Unfortunately they are unavoidable as I have to work with them!

-_-

chocolatemilk said...

Thanks!
Hahaha, aww =P

Eeshie said...

WOW.

...WOW OH WOW.

A douchebag is finally being defined. OH MY GOD, THIS WAS SO FUNNY. WHY ARE YOU SO FUNNY?? AND HOW DID YOU FIND THAT PICTURE? DUDE, I LOVE YOUR SENSE OF HUMOR.

And...yeah. :D

chocolatemilk said...

Hahaha aww. Thanks lol.
I was looking for pictures, funny ones, that involved something little hitting something big. Thanks a lot! :D

Vice Versa said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
that laugh was required to be typed in capitals :p

it is SO funny! You are so funny! the examples were so funny! and the song was brilliant! :D

ROFL.

chocolatemilk said...

Hahah yay! :P Thanks :)

KeriDaEpicNinjaOfEpicness said...

Awesomesauce!!! Totally cracked me up! And yea, douchebags are the WORST! They should be exterminated! BTW, i love your blog :) *following*

chocolatemilk said...

Haha! Yesss, they should be!
Yayy, thank you! :D

PurpleMist. said...

Hahahahaa, the whole time I was reading this I had this ONE person in my mind, he's such a douchebag!!